Who is Kayla?

I’m so glad you ask.

This is a topic that inevitably comes up as I’ve developed connections with new people in my life over the years. There always comes a point where I’m telling stories & the person needs broader context. Eventually they stop me & ask, “Okay… but who is Kayla?”

I usually say best friend, but that doesn’t really do our relationship justice. We’re family. We’ve chosen to make sure that’s the case for 21 years. For 10 of those years, we haven’t lived in the same state — since we were 18 & left for college. That’s the high-level context. Now let me rewind.

It was December 2004 when we first met. Kayla’s family had just moved from another Chicago suburb where she’d grown up. Kayla is the only girl in a family with 4 kids. She has an older brother that is 6 years older than her & two twin brothers who are 4 years younger. My family had also just moved from the house where I was raised. We were both new to the neighborhood. Both uprooted. But somehow, we ended up living 3 houses apart & found each other.

Kayla has been my favorite creative partner throughout the years. Our inner children know how to play well together. As an only child, I spent a lot of time in my own little world. I had a big imagination & was content entertaining myself. I had friends, but Kayla was the first person I really let into that inner world. The early days of our friendship started off kind of slow. Then one day it was just… solidified. Best friends. That was that.

We were always up to something. My mom gave me her old video camera… Kayla & I thought that was the shit. We created our own talk show. I actually found some of the old tapes this year & took them to a guy in SF to get transferred to digital. Kayla & I were on a train in France watching them together, alternating between cringing & cackling. Probably more cackling.

We also cut an EP together. Kayla had a notebook where she wrote songs so she picked a few & sang them. I was a whiz in GarageBand at the time so I engineered & produced it. I also handled distribution (which just means I burned it onto CDs). Kayla even gave one to her fifth-grade teacher. We ran a lemonade stand that briefly dabbled with bike repairs. The bike repair was very much a me idea. Kayla wanted no part of that. I had absolutely no idea how to repair bikes, but I was ambitious & already thought like an engineer.

We did theater camp together. Girl Scouts. Hip hop class (we even had a solo together). Summer camp.

As we grew up, our interests started to diverge though. We were always in different classes. Kayla did cheerleading. I played basketball. Still, when it came to the person you just hung out with, it was always Kayla. This is because we became more than friends… we were family. I did a lot with her family & she did a lot with mine. We went on Spring Break together every single year. We even drew up adoption papers for each of our parents to sign (not so sure those would hold up in court).

Eventually came college decisions. I ended up going to the University of Iowa. Kayla went to Mizzou. Kayla majored in Communications. I majored in Computer Science & Engineering. We were in very different worlds. I think our families were nervous about how we’d handle the separation. We’d had each other since we were 7 so navigating college without that constant felt like the Wild West. We took full advantage of breaks & visited each other at least once a year. We built our own lives & friend groups, but everyone knew who Kayla was, & all of Kayla’s friends at Mizzou knew who I was.

During college, we even went on a notable trip to Italy together. It was 2017. My mom planned a two-week trip for me, Kayla, her friend, & her boyfriend. We rented a car & hit something like 17 cities. It was chaotic & a great time.

That’s where we discovered the Aperol Spritz… before it was what it is now in the US. We kept seeing these bright orange drinks everywhere & were intrigued but suspicious. They looked like they’d be way too sweet. Eventually, sitting at a small street café, we ordered one. Fireworks. It was bitter, crisp, & somehow still perfect. It gave us the goofiest buzz & they were only 3 or 4 euro at the time. A couple years later, it became one of the most popular cocktails in the world. We still joke that we knew before everyone else did. You would have thought we were brand reps with how we promoted this drink after we got back.

That's the thing about Kayla & I… we've always been good at aimless adventures together. You never know what we’re going to find. This has shown up time & time again over the years. Whether that be playing around the neighborhood as kids. Driving around our hometown with the music blasting throughout high school. Visiting each other on our college campuses & going out. Traveling to Europe together. Her visiting me in NYC & SF. Me visiting her in Chicago. We have stories that span it all.

After college graduation, I moved to SF. Kayla stayed in Illinois. The distance grew even further, our individual lives were starting to take shape, & somehow the foundation only got stronger.

I dove into my first job as a software engineer at a start up. Kayla started in tech sales, but realized it wasn’t for her, quit, & followed something that lit her up more. She did consulting work managing socials, became a reiki master, an astrologer, & was at the ground floor of a wellness center that opened in Chicago’s West Loop. On paper, our careers couldn’t look more different. In reality, we were both doing things that we were extremely passionate about, outside of the typical corporate structures. We were learning a lot, moving at a fast pace, wearing a lot of different hats, & seeing how things get built from the ground up. Our toolboxes just each looked a little different. I was learning how technical systems & products get made, she was learning how to see people & create spaces for them. We always cared to understand what the other was doing.

It’s weird seeing a friend you’ve known since childhood in their professional element for the first time. I remember where it really clicked: Kayla had come to SF to go to a wedding with me for a friend we both went to high school with. Over the weekend, she read a bunch of people’s birth charts, both at the wedding & later with other friends. I just remember looking over at her & feeling this wave of admiration.

Us with our Sweetgreen on the way to said wedding.

She commanded the room, people hung on every word, & she did it with care because reading someone like that can be vulnerable. I knew she was in her element & providing people with another tool to understand themselves.

Over the years, whether it’s a day of adventure or a long phone call, we get each other. We challenge each other. We respect each other. We offer each other new perspectives. We come from the same foundation, but it’s manifested very differently for each of us. We’ve watched each other grow through most seasons of life while continuing to choose each other as family.

Looking back, it’s obvious this was always where things were headed.

Kayla & I are now co-founders. We’re continuing our creative partnership & play in a new way, colliding our unique perspectives with the trust & respect built over the last 21 years.

That’s who Kayla Lehman is to me.